


Golden Fires

by DaisiesGuardYou



Series: Phoenix Series [2]
Category: Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins
Genre: F/F, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-25
Updated: 2020-09-27
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:21:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 12,852
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25516441
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DaisiesGuardYou/pseuds/DaisiesGuardYou
Summary: Ash Rooker has won the Games. But not with out a sacrifice. She lost someone she loved and now has to deal with the consequences. Along with a budding spark between her and the mayors daughter.
Relationships: Cato (Hunger Games)/Original Female Character(s), Madge Undersee/Original Female Character(s)
Series: Phoenix Series [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1847926
Kudos: 2





	1. Chapter 1

It's been a few weeks since the Games and I'm sinking into the abyss. The weight of the darkness is crushing me. Not just from loosing Cato but because for the first time I'm letting myself feel the weight to my parents deaths. I'm letting myself feel Terras death. It might be crushing me from the inside. 

"Phoenix." Katniss shakes my shoulder. "It's time to go hunting." She says. 

"Okay." I answer. I get up and turn to Katniss. "Let's go." 

"Yeah. Madge is meeting us." Katniss says. "She wants to learn." 

"Okay sounds good." I say. I haven't seen Madge very much since I returned home. I blush slightly and shoo Katniss out of my room. I change quickly and grab my money bag. I hurry down to join Katniss. "You ready?" 

"Yeah." Katniss answers wolfing down some bread. 

"You guys have the money?" Mrs Everdeen asks. 

"Yeah see you this afternoon mom." Katniss says. She's been warmer to Mrs Everdeen since I've returned. I think she decided that if she lost her best friends she'll need someone. 

"Ash Haymitch asked for some more white liquor." Mrs Everdeen says. "You better not be drinking it with him." 

"I'm not." I promise. "I just give it to him and clean up his house." 

"Well it's good for you to get out." Mrs Everdeen says. She exchanges a glance with Katniss. They're worried about me. I can tell. I carefully braid my hair back. I've been leaving it loose when I'm not hunting. It's the one good thing that came of the Games. I'm worried about me. I'm sinking into a deep abyss that seems endless. 

"Yeah." I force a small smile. "I'll see you guys soon. Drift should be up soon." 

"Yeah I'll have breakfast ready. Speaking of breakfast, you need to eat it." Mrs Everdeen passes me some bread. The good bakery bread. It's Drifts birthday tomorrow maybe I'll splurge a little and buy her a bakery cake. 

"Hey Mo- Mrs Everdeen." I correct myself quickly. But she is like my mom. "It's Drifts birthday tomorrow and she's always loved the cakes. Do you think I could maybe buy her one today?" 

"I think that's a great idea." Mrs Everdeen says. "Mind taking Prim after you're done hunting?" 

"Of course not! We will make it an outing." I say. 

"Yep. Us and Prim." Katniss smiles. I choke down the bread and nod towards the seam. 

"Let's get going." I say. We leave and hurry to the mayors house. Madge is waiting for us and smiles at us. "Hey Madge." 

"Hey Ash." Madge smiles at me. I smile back. I can't help but brush a curl back. 

"Come on. Let's stop by our houses." Katniss says. I'm glad to have a buffer. We hurry to our houses and I slip into my hunting boots and my hunting jacket. It used to be my dads and its slightly too big for me. I step out and hurry to the meadow to wait for Katniss and Madge. They join me after a few minutes. 

"Alright, lets get going." Katniss says. We slide under the fence and hurry into the woods. We split up to retrieve our bows and I walk to our normal spot. I automatically start looking for a tree and get my bow ready. The Games have left me on edge. 

Madge comes into view and I can't help but smile as she nervously holds the bow. I walk over to her and gently fix her quiver. I gently take her hand and readjust the bow in her hand. We stand there for a few seconds just staring at each other from a few inches away when Katniss joins us. 

"Okay lets get going." I say shakily. I step away and start into the woods. Katniss and Madge follow me and I start towards where the birds nest. Turkeys aren't too abundant right now but they will be in a few months. We can afford the butcher meat now but I guess some sort of guilt keeps me hunting for the Hawthornes. After all they would be taken care of if it wasn't for me. 

Katniss pauses to shoot down a bird and collects it. She sets it in her game bag and we start for our snares. It's easier to hunt for a single family so we don't have to spend as much time in the woods. I spend more time in the woods though because it still feels like home and I can hide in the woods in a tree and only Katniss will come looking for me. I pull back an arrow and shoot a bird, at the last second the bird turns into Gale and I stumble back into a tree gasping for breath. Hunting has gotten harder. Katniss reaches me first and gently rubs my back. Madge kneels in front of me and blocks Gales body from view. 

"It's not real." She says softly. She's right. He's already gone. Tears blur my vision. I've spent the past few weeks of celebrations avoiding crying because the cameras were still rolling. I can't cry but I do. The tears spill over and they both hug me while I silently sob. I'm finally breaking but at least I have people to help hold me together. 

After a little I manage to pull myself together and we start for the snares. I pick up the bird and clean my arrow. I slip it back into my quiver and find the first snare. Our snares aren't as good as Gales but no ones are. We collect them and carefully reset them so we can collect tomorrow's too. We start back for Twelve. I pass Katniss the game in my bag and slide under the fence. 

"You have the money for the Hawthornes?" I ask. She nods. "Okay. I'll meet you by the bakery?" 

"Yeah see you there." Katniss says. We slide under the fence and Madge follows me into the Hob. It's odd having an empty game bag and a full bag of money when I walk into the Hob. 

I try to hit all the stalls and spread my money evenly. I've got to help the district. I buy a few bottles of the white liquor for Haymitch. I understand him better now and I want to make sure he's always well stocked. I lead Madge to Greasy Saes stall and buy us some soup. We eat it slowly and I smile at the peacekeepers. They've been nice since I've returned. 

We eat our soup hurriedly and I take Madge back home. I walk to the bakery and lean against a building as I wait for Katniss. She appears soon with Prim in tow. I smile and we walk in. We carefully pick out a cake we think she'll like and start taking it back to our house.


	2. Chapter 2

I yawn and stretch. It's almost bedtime and I'm waiting for Drift to get out of the bath. She runs into my room and jumps on my bed. I laugh and wrap my arms around her. Prim joins me on the bed and I smile at her softly. Katniss sits on my bed and wraps her arms around Prim. Mrs Everdeen sits on the edge of the bed and I brush a curl out of Drifts eye. 

"Birthday story!" Drift cries. Every year I tell her how our parents met and about the first time I met her. 

"Okay okay." I smile. "Well mom and dad met when they were very young. Younger than you." 

"They were at school and mom heard dad sing. I guess it must be the part of the seam because him and Mr Everdeen made all the birds stop singing and all the girls fell in love." Drift sighs. "I always love that part." 

"Yeah." I smile and glance up at Mrs Everdeen. She's also smiling. "So mom hears dad sing and she swears the birds stop to listen. She turns to Mrs Everdeen and says that she's gonna marry him someday." 

"She does. She spends the next eight years befriending him to her parents dismay. He kissed her for the very first time on her 14th birthday. She kissed him back and they fell in love. So when Haymitch got back he hosted a big wedding for them and they got married. After six years of marriage they had Ash. Then they had Terra and finally they had you." Mrs Everdeen says. 

"Yeah and I of course ran away to be with Katniss because I was a sissy as a nine year old. I actually ended up going into the woods. But when I came back dad put you in my arms and you smiled up at me. You had the most adorable smile. Then dad said, your sisters your responsibility." I say brushing her hair back. "I remember you had this tiny tuft of hair and these big brown eyes. You wrapped your hand around my finger and suddenly I knew I had two very important responsibilities." 

"And now bed time." Drift sighs. "Sing?" 

"Okay." I say softly. I start singing to her softly. She slowly falls asleep and I finish the song. I scoop her up and carry her over to her room. I gently tuck her into bed and brush her hair out of her face. I return to my room and find the others asleep. I don't sleep anymore. I carefully tuck them into my bed and walk downstairs. 

I carefully pour myself a cup of white liquor and walk over to the tv. I turn it on and find a recap of the Games. I hate watching them but that's all I'll find anyway m. It's my Games they're playing and it's on the feast. Gale jumps on me and then his blood is covering me. Clove lifts him off me and I scramble away. My breath quickens and I can feel the blood. I can feel my quiver pressing between my shoulder blades. I feel the panic about loosing Cato. I feel The rush of dread knowing that death was coming. I clamp my hand over my mouth as bile comes up. I can't breathe. I'm still dressed so I set down my glass and leave my house gasping for breath. Haymitch's house sits across from me and I run away from it. I sprint down towards the district and slow trying to avoid seeming crazy. 

I slip into my old house and slip on my hunting jacket. I put my boots on and grab the lantern I use for night hunting. I hurry to the fence and slip under to find myself in the woods. I do this sometimes when I can’t sleep. I hurry into the woods and get my bow. I swing my quiver over my back and hurry towards the lake. The further from the district I am the better I feel. I reach the lake and the old house I don’t go into the old house though. Instead I find a tree and climb it. I keep a backpack of supplies in this tree and I carefully get a length of rope out. I tie myself in and stare out at the stars. 

I wake with the sun and find Katniss waiting below for me. I climb down carefully leaving my bag in the tree. Katniss holds her full game bag. She rubs my arm and we start back for the district. 

“Hazel wants to see you.” Katniss says softly. I glance at her. “She forgives you.” 

“I killed her son.” I say rather harshly. “He could’ve won if it wasn’t for me.” 

“You didn’t mean to. She knows that. He was attacking you and you reacted.” Katniss answers. I glance at her. It seems everyone has forgiven me for killing Gale but me. 

“I can’t see her right now.” I answer. 

“Why not?” Katniss asks. 

“Because I don’t think she’s forgiven me. I don’t see how she can forgive me when I haven’t forgiven myself.” I snap. 

“Why not?” Katniss asks. 

“Because I took the only bow. I didn’t give him a chance. Then when he finally had a bow I killed him. He didn’t even know he finally had a chance at life and I took it away from him.” My voice cracks. “I took away his only chance at life.” 

“No you didn’t. He had a more than fair shot before you killed him.” Katniss says. “She forgave you because during the Games he wasn’t our Gale anymore. He wouldn’t return as the Gale we knew.” Katniss says. “Just try and come tomorrow.” 

“Okay.” I say softly. We part ways. She slips me some extra money and I start for the town. We have all the food we need but I want to get Drift a present. Madge walks out to join me and gently takes my hand. 

“So I heard it’s Drifts birthday.” Madge says. 

“Yeah I’m going to buy her a dress.” I say. 

“Hey. Are you okay?” Madge says softly leading me off to an alley.

“Yeah I just, I miss Gale. The tv was playing the Games last night and I just happened to tune in during the feast.” I answer. 

“Well it’ll be okay.” Madge says softly. She brushes a piece of hair from my eyes. Her eyes are so blue. They’re so bright and full of concern and before I can stop myself I kiss her. 

She kisses me back and I pull herself closer. Her arms go around me and I find myself pressed against the wall of the store behind me. I pull back and take a breath. 

“I’m so sorry I shouldn’t have done that.” I mumble. 

“No it’s okay.” Madge says softly. “Let’s go get Drift a present.” 

“Yeah let’s.” I agree. We separate and carefully walk to the dress store. Madge helps me pick out a beautiful green dress for Drift and we split up.


	3. Chapter 3

Drift is dancing around our sitting room smiling. She's got her new dress on and she's twirling around. I smile and lean against the wall. Katniss gently taps me on the shoulder. 

"Come on let's get the cake." She says. "I found candles at the Hob." 

"Wait really?" I grin. We've never had candles and we kept hearing about the merchant kids having candles on their birthdays. I'm just glad I can finally give Drift every thing she wants. Katniss nods smiling and we carefully get the cake ready and carry it to the table. Prim giggles and turns out the lights while I light the candles. "Drift!" 

"Yeah?" Drift comes running over to us and stops slapping her hands over her mouth in awe. "It's so pretty. Who's it for?" 

"It's for you!" Prim answers. Drift smiles and approaches it carefully. She takes a deep breath and blows the candles out. "Okay now we eat cake." 

"Yay!" Drift grinned. She was handed a piece of cake and she took a bite. Her eyes widened. "This is good." 

"Glad to know Drift." I say smiling. I get handed a piece of cake and I take a bite. It reminds me of the food from the Capitol. Unbearably rich but at the same time wonderfully rich. "Okay make sure you pace yourselves guys. Rich food makes you sick." 

Prim and Katniss nod as they dig into their cake. Mrs Everdeen carefully cuts herself a tiny piece of cake and nibbles on it. She sighs. 

"I missed cake." She said softly. I smile and set down my cake. It's making me think about the Capitol and it's sticking in my mouth and throat. I glance away from the party and go to grab some water. I drink the water and walk over to the door as someone knocks. It's Haymitch. I invited him to help us celebrate. He follows me to the kitchen and takes a piece of cake. 

"Hey sweetheart." He smiled and holds out a necklace. Drift takes it and holds it out to me. I carefully put it on her. 

"Do I look pretty?" Drift asks. 

"You look gorgeous!" I answer smiling. 

"Like you did in the Capitol?" Drift asks. 

"No you look prettier." I answer. Drift smiles and goes back to twirling around. She dances around the living room and smiles. She pulls Prim into dance with her. 

"Got any alcohol sweetheart?" Haymitch asks. I nod and pull out a bottle. I pour him a glass and he slide one over to me. Despite the disapproving stares I get from Katniss and Mrs Everdeen, I pour myself a glass. Haymitch clinks his glass against mine and drinks it. I sip mine instead, I only drink one glass because it numbs everything. I down the rest of the glass and set it down. Katniss takes a glass and takes a sip. Her face screws up and I grin. She drink the rest and shudders. 

"Why do you drink that?" She gags. 

"Can't feel anything if you're drunk." I answer shrugging. "Plus if you can't remember what hurt you it doesn't hurt." 

"Oh." Katniss says softly. "Well have some more cake." 

"Oh force it on me." I grin and take my slice of cake. I finish it and set my plate down. 

Drift has slowed down by now and has sat on the couch, falling asleep. Prim has also fallen asleep on the couch. The sugar must've gotten to them. Mrs Everdeen carefully takes care of them while Katniss packs up the cake. We sit around the table and Haymitch studies me. 

"You haven't been sleeping, or eating from the looks of it." He says matter of factly. 

"I have been sleeping." I answer. I don't bother with the eating thing. I eat when Mrs Everdeen makes me. "I just don't sleep here." 

"Ahh." Haymitch nods and slides me a full glass. "Well six months from now you've got the victory tour. You're going to have to give a speech in Districts Eleven and Two. A heartfelt speech." 

"Great." I mutter. I don't want to think about Cato or Rue. My mom always had a way with words but I didn't talk to people that much so it must've been lost on me. I sigh. "Yeah I'll get on that." 

"Sounds good." Haymitch finishes his drink. "I didn't have to. I only had one ally and she was from here." 

"Can't I just not show up in two? Can't we just skip that one?" I ask. I'm already dreading having to see Catos face again. It reminds me that I can't save him and now I'm forever stuck in that arena. 

"Unfortunately no. Snow will probably be waiting for that one to make sure everyone sees the broken hearted victor." Haymitch says. I shake my head and sigh. 

"Yeah guess he does. Great entertainment." I mutter. Haymitch shrugs. 

"Yeah. Well thanks for the cake. I'll see you later." Haymitch leaves taking my bottle with him. I stare down at my drink and down it. 

The next morning I find myself in bed. I can't move, the sadness is paralyzing me. I huddle under my blankets. My room is a mess of crumbled up pieces of paper of speeches I'll never read. Katniss is shaking me. I try and move but I can't. 

"Ash!" Katniss exclaims. "You can't leave me too!" She leaves my bed and runs down to get her mom. Mrs Everdeen comes into my room sometime later and tips something into my mouth. I force myself to swallow and then slowly I can sit up. Katniss grabs a speech and opens it. "Oh, come on. You're getting dressed and we're going hunting." She says. 

"Okay." I agree. The woods always make me feel better. It still feels safe. I dress quickly and follow Katniss down to District Twelve. 

"Ash!" Madge runs over to join us. "We need to talk." 

"Why don't you come to the woods with me?" I offer. "We can talk there." 

"Okay." Madge follows us into the woods and we hurry to retrieve our bows. Madge gently tugs me toward a clearing. “You kissed me.” 

“I’ve had feelings for you since I was six. I don’t know I guess my emotions just got to me.” I shake my head. Madge kisses me. I kiss her back. She pulls back for second and smiles at me. 

“I’ve had feelings for you since I was six too. You should’ve told me earlier.” Madge says. “Be my girlfriend?” 

“Sure.” I smile. We head back over to Katniss who sees our hands. 

“Finally!” She shouts. “I’ve been waiting for years. Since Ash told me.” 

“Well now I’ve got a girlfriend.” Madge kisses my hand and I smile. 

“Yeah well now we’ve got hunting to do.” I blush. “Besides everyone in the Capitol thinks I’m mourning my fiancé.” 

“Oh details!” Katniss smiles. “I’m just glad to see you smiling. Really smiling.” 

“Well I’m happy.” I answer. It’s true. For the first time since the Games, I’m really happy.


	4. Chapter 4

I sit by the lake staring out over it. I force myself to stand and stretch. I'm stiff from sitting here. My hands are wrapped around a thermos of tea although it's long gone cold. Today is the start of my victory tour. Today I have to relieve the 23 deaths that plague my dreams. My team will be here at noon to beautify me into what the Capitol expects from me. 

"Hey Phoenix!" Katniss calls. I smile at her. It's been easier these last six months. 

"Hey catnip." I answer. She links arms with me and we start towards the snares. 

"So you excited to see the districts?" She asks. 

"Some of them." I answer. "Haymitch signed off on my speeches last night." 

"Really?" Katniss says. 

"Yeah apparently they're the perfect touch of rebellion." I answer. "But they're also honest enough to get me by." 

"Well good." Katniss says. "I'm kind of sick of seeing you curled up in bed not moving." 

"Well this is the last time." I answer. "After the tour my Games can be a distant memory." 

"Good." Katniss says. We silently take down all the game and reset the snares. I pass her the game and we split up. I have finally managed to return to the Hawthornes but today I can't bare to see their faces. I'm being sent on a two week trip to celebrate my win but I don't feel like celebrating anything. I get to see all the districts which will be nice, I haven't seen the other districts before. But then I've got to go to the Capitol and see everyone all over again. I have to see everyone I knew when Cato was still here. 

I step into my house and Mrs Everdeen greets me. She takes my empty bag and makes me take my shoes off. I shrug off my coat and set it on the rack. "How was your walk?" Mrs Everdeen asks breathlessly. 

"Walk?" I ask before spotting the well dressed people in the kitchen waiting for me. "It was good. I was going to see if the goat man would breed Lady but I couldn't find him." 

"You have a visitor." Mrs Everdeen says. 

"Oh is Cinna here early?" I ask pretending not to notice the men from the Capitol.

"No it's-" Mrs Everdeen starts. One of the men interrupts her. 

"Right this way Miss Rooker." One of the men leads me to a study. I slip inside and find myself face to face with President Snow. 

“Grandfather.” I say stiffly. 

“There’s a lot of heat on you Miss Rooker.” He says. “Your little stunt with the forcefield looked bad.” 

“I was just trying to save Cato.” I say flatly. Not that I could even do that. 

“Yes, a desperate girl trying to save her fiancé. The Capitol ate it right up. Especially with how you begged him to stay alive after he was already gone.” Snow smiles. “Let me just say some canons went off without needing to.” 

My mind races, Gale? Or dare I dream that Cato didn’t die? “What do you mean?” 

“You’ll find out. Now make sure to quell the uprising. Play the grieving girlfriend. Or maybe your new little girlfriend will experience a little accident.” He stands and leaves the room. I stare forward. Madge. He knows about Madge. Nothing happens to Madge. I’ll make sure of it. She gets to live. Even if it’s without me. 

“Okay move.” I whisper. I stand and leave the room. There’s a rose sitting there. It’s the same type of rose that I was sent in the arena. That left with Gale. The rose covered in blood. My hands are shaking and I resist the urge to run back to the woods and never return. I instead return to Mrs Everdeen who sends me up to the bath. It smells of roses and I sink it it happily. I sit there for a while and then carefully soap up. I finish washing myself off and step out of the bath. I’m just finishing drying off when my prep team bursts in. 

They wail at the sight of me. They haven’t seen me since the Capitol and when I’m not there, I only shower and clean my clothes. They busy themselves with me, carefully fixing my eyebrows, carefully fixing my nails that I’ve started chewing on, and doing my makeup. Most of me won’t be seen so my full body wax can wait until tomorrow. I slip into a robe and I’m sent down to join Cinna. He smiles at me and I hug him tightly. 

“Hey uncle Cinna.” I mumble. He gently smooths my curls. 

“Hey Ash.” He says. He hands me a pair on pants and a warm coat. It’s not unlike what I was wearing earlier. I slip into another room and get dressed. It covers everything but my head and Cinna gives me a pair of ear muffs. I rather hate them. They muffle the sound around me and it reminds me of the arena. My eyes frantically make sure I know everything that’s going on. Cinna lets me take them off until I have to appear and I sigh in relief. I’m led to my sitting room and find my guitar. It’s the one thing I saved from my parents house. Drift had already saved all of our photos and most of our clothes were left behind for the sake of buying new clothes that are more suited to my new rank in society. Most of the my clothes I did sneak into my room and I still wear them. 

I take a seat and pick up my guitar, I chose it as my talent. My guitar has been passed down for generations in my family. With each family member teaching the others how to play. My dad taught me as much as he could before he died and I still play quite a bit. I mainly play during the evenings for Katniss and Drift. Prim and Mrs Everdeen always enjoy listening too but Katniss and Drift always ask me to play for them. When I had to pick a talent, Katniss immediately suggested my guitar. I’m not even sure I’m supposed to have a guitar but I’m thankful I have it. 

We film a few scenes of me playing the guitar and then I have to read from a script they give me. After we’re done filming I’m sent out so my prep team can do the finishing touches, then I’m led into the street so I can greet Caesar. 

“Ash! It’s lovely to see you!” Caesar greets me. 

“Hi Caesar!” I answer waving at the camera. 

“We can’t wait to see you!” He says. I smile. 

“I can’t wait to see you guys either!” I answer. He smiles and I hear the crowd cheering before it’s gone. My family surrounds me and hugs me tightly. My prep team and Haymitch are waiting for me. I let go of them and gently smile. “See you guys in two weeks.” I say. “Tell Madge I said goodbye.” 

“Okay.” Katniss steps away and the others follow suit. I’m led to a car which takes me to the train. I rather hate the train now.


	5. Chapter 5

The first stop on my tour is District Eleven. We always go down in descending order but we skip over the victors District because after the Capitol portion is over, we return and the Capitol throw a party for the entire District. So first I have to talk about Rue. I have to give a speech about her. I have to talk about loosing her. My chest tightens and suddenly I can't breathe. I force the window open and lean on my hands so I can gulp down the fresh air. The air is warmer. It's practically balmy now. My prep team should be here in a minute to wax my body. 

Sure enough, there's a knock at my door. I open it and they lead me to a room. They make me get on a table and then they start their work. By now I'm used to being in pain so I make little noise. Instead I stare up at the ceiling. It helps me avoid thinking about everything I have to do. I'm soon done with my body wax and I'm given to Cinna. 

"Well you get to wear something less girlish." Cinna says. He holds a nice dress. It's nice, it reminds me of my reaping dress. I slip into it and he gently arranges my hair into an elaborate braid. He adjusts my makeup and then sends me to breakfast. 

"Hey sweetheart." Haymitch says. "You look nice." 

"Thanks." I mumble. I nibble on some fruit and try not to think about Rue. 

"So we'll be at each district for about a day. You'll give a speech written by the Capitol, then if you were allies you'll give another speech. You've got to give two. One in Eleven and one in Two. Everyone thinks Cato was your lost fiancé so they're expecting the water works in Two." He warns. 

"Yeah, of course they will." I mumble. I'm dreading going to Two and One the most after Eleven. At Two I have to see Catos face again, and I killed both of the tributes from One. 

"We're here!" Effie says shrilly. I glance out the window and bite my lip. I can already tell they're more closely monitored than Twelve. There would be no escape here. I'm not completely used to these things because for the most part I tried to avoid listening then I run to the woods and disappear. I especially did that two years ago. I felt bad because of Drift but Drift didn't understand what was happening. She just ran after her friends. Katniss had come with me and I had gone as far into the woods as I could. I wanted to disappear. I wanted to leave and never come back. I wanted to travel and see the rest of the world. But I had Drift. I couldn't. 

Effie sends me to my compartment so Cinna can put on the final touches. Right as he's finishing, we pull into the station. We're let off the train but instead of the mayor we're greeted by peacekeepers who lead us to an armoured truck. We're taken to the justice building and I'm ushered to the stage. I walk onto the stage and take my flowers. I give my thank you speech and then I glance at the families. One of Rues sisters looks just like her. Even the way she stands remind me of Rue. As I look out over the crowd I realize that I look more like the people here than I do back home. 

“I never got the chance to know Thresh.” I start. I can’t pull eyes off of Rues family. “I did get to know Rue. I know she loved music and that she was too young to be in those Games. She was too gentle. I wish I could’ve saved her. I’m so sorry I couldn’t, I tried so hard and if I could go back and save her I would. I still see her everywhere. I see her everywhere. I see her in Prim, I see her in my sister Drift, I see her in the flowers that grown in my District, and I see her in the birds around my District. Nothing can bring her back.” 

I glance back to the closed doors. Haymitch will hate me if I do this. No, Effie will hate me. I have to do this. I couldn’t save Rue, but I can make sure her siblings don’t have to worry about food or their family. 

“From now on I’m going to pledge one month of my winnings each to the families of the tributes.” I say. There’s the whistle that said Rue was safe in the arena and a man does District Twelve salute. My mic is cut off and I’m given a plaque. The mayor closes the ceremony and I’m taken back towards the doors. I double back for my flowers and I see the old man being forced onto his knees, then a bullet goes through his skull. I turn and hurry into the Justice building. 

“We heard a noise but Haymitch said it was a car back firing.” Effie says. 

“Haymitch is right.” I answer. “It was a car back firing.” 

There are several more shots and Cinna has the sense to take me away to get ready. We have the dinner tonight, my prep team is excited because they’re important enough to score an invite. I’ve been put in a long strapless red dress and I’m taken to the venue. 

The next few districts go the same way. Most of them have the same feeling I imagine Twelve gives off but a few have a real feeling of unrest. I know it shouldn’t but it energizes me. I’m dreading Two so much Cinna has to take in my clothes at the waist. My prep team has started fretting about the circles under my eyes due to my inability to sleep. Effie gave me some sleeping pills but I hate them. They just trap me in the dreams. 

When we reach Two it mostly starts the same but as I step onto the stage, I can’t help but see that it’s only Cloves family then I see him. His blue eyes, his smile, and I’m sure it’s him. I can’t stop myself as I run and throw myself into his arms. He didn’t leave me, I don’t know how he’s here but he’s alive. He’s alive and that’s all that matters.


	6. Chapter 6

Cato, it's Cato. His arms are around my waist and my face is buried in his chest. He's here, he's real. I finally feel safe again. 

"You're real tight?" I mumble. "Please tell me your real." 

"I'm real." Cato promises. I pull back long enough to kiss him. The cameras expect it from us. He gently slips my ring back on my finger and I cover my mouth. 

"I can't believe you're here." I say softly choking back tears. He hugs me tightly again. 

"I'm not leaving you again." He promised softly. I nod as I'm overcome with emotion. 

It takes a few moments for him to calm me down enough so we can do the ceremony but even then I'm not leaving his arms and he has to take over the speeches. He gives a speech about Clove while he gently holds me close to him. We're led back to the Justice building and Cinna starts leading me away. I struggle towards Cato and Cato gently takes my hand. 

"I'm going to be waiting for you." He promises. "I'm not going anywhere." 

"Okay." I mumble. I let Cinna lead me back to my changing room and change me into an off the shoulder gown that's the exact color of Catos eyes. I'm led out to join Cato again and he smiles. 

"You look great in blue Doll." He says softly. 

"Thanks." I say smiling at him. We're led to a cat and I can't help but cuddle close to him. I don't care that the others are watching. Right now I just care that he's here. 

For the next few days we're inseparable. He doesn't even bother going to his room and instead we stay in mine. We both sleep better than we have in months. For once my nightmares aren't overwhelming. We still wake each other up screaming for the other to run but at least in each other's arms we're able to to get some sleep. One is even almost bearable with him there. I am technically still the only Victor for the 74th Hunger Games but everyone treats him like a victor too. But he's here and he's real. 

We finally reach the Capitol and to my surprise Cato is allowed to join my during my interview. They've give us a love seat and I'm still cuddling him. I don't want to let go because I'm still afraid that if I do he'll be gone and I'll wake up. 

"So Ash how are you feeling?" Caesar asks. 

"I can't believe he's here." I say my voice cracking. "He's finally here." 

Cato holds me close as I bury my face into his chest again. Caesar and Cato talk about his recovery and what happened to him while I hide. It takes them a while to get me to finally come out of his shirt. After they do Cato stands taking me with him. There's Snow and the little girl again. They have a crown which they carefully place on Catos head. They take a second crown and place it on my head. It's my crown from before. 

"Due to unforeseen circumstances, our final two managed to both leave the arena alive." Snow says. "So I now introduce the Victors of the 74th annual Hunger Games! Cato Hadley and Ash Rooker from District Twelve." 

District Twelve? Cato must've been put as. District Twelve victor for the sake of keeping us together. It's the only thing that makes sense. Well I at least have him, and he'll be okay. 

"As well, our victors will be staying in the Capitol for a little longer so we can throw them a wedding." Snow announces. A rush of dread hits me. I was sure it would come to this but I was hoping for at least another year. "And I would like to officially welcome Ash Rooker into my family." 

"Thank you so much." Cato says. He gently squeezes me. I know what I'm supposed to do so I cross to Snow and hug him gently. 

"Thank you so much grandfather." I say smiling. Snow gently slips his arm around me. 

"From now on, it shall be known in panem that her descendants are under Snows protection." Snow says. The crowd cheers and we're sent off stage. 

"So you're now officially Snows granddaughter." Cato says. I shrug. 

"Yeah but it's not gonna stop any kids we have from going into the Games." I answer. "It doesn't mean much." 

"Yeah but come on." Cato chuckles. I shake my head as we enter the elevator and fly up to our rooms. 

"No it'll just make the people in Twelve look at me different. Hell it'll make everyone look at me different." I sigh. "I can't believe I'm getting married without Katniss here." 

The doors open and suddenly arms are around me and I've been smacked in the face by a braid. I wrap my arm around Katniss and she pulls back. She turns to Cato and promptly punches him. He stumbles back swearing and holding his nose. 

"Katniss!" I exclaim. 

"You spent weeks curled up in bed not moving and suddenly he's alive?" Katniss snaps. She does have a point. 

“It’s not his fault.” I answer softly. “He was probably locked up somewhere.” 

“We should show Katniss the roof.” Cato says suddenly. Katniss and I exchange a look. 

“It’s really windy on the roof.” I say casually. Katniss nods and we leave for the roof. I lead them to the corner of the garden where they can’t overhear us. We glance at Cato and he takes a deep breath. 

“They kept me under for like three months and when I came to, I couldn’t remember the Games at all. They had me on a bunch of drugs to bring my memory back. They were planning on sending me straight to Twelve so they could have a big reveal and I could meet all of your family and they could announce the wedding there. But it took me a little longer than expected for me to remember everything, by the time I did you were in nine so they reset it for Two. That’s why I wasn’t back sooner.” He says. Katniss nods. 

“Okay.” I answer softly. I gently take his hand. “How’s Madge?” I ask. 

“She’s sad, she doesn’t quite understand.” Katniss says. 

“Snow threatened her before the tour.” I say softly. “I was going to break up with her after the tour. She’s safer without me.” 

“Well now you’re getting married.” Katniss smirks Mx 

“I thought I’d have a few more years.” I protest. 

“Well now we have a week.” Cato pulls me close to him. 

“Well we should go to bed.” Katniss says. “You two have a lot to do this week.” 

“Alright I agree.” I answer. Cato scoops me up and we leave the roof. We find our way to my old room and he sets me down on the bed. He climbs into bed next to me and holds me close. “Okay before we get married, can I know your favourite color?” I ask. 

“Silver like the moon.” Cato answers. “You?” 

“Green, like trees.” I answer. He chuckles. 

“Well we already know so much more about each other.” He says. I nod and let out a breath. Before I can force myself to stay awake, I’m asleep in his arms.


	7. Chapter 7

I wake the next morning tangled up next to Cato. My prep team hangs over me and I sigh. I carefully extract myself from Catos arms and I'm taken into Katniss' room. She's by the corner clearly viewing the prep team as the enemy. I walk over to her and gently help her up. 

"Listen they're odd but they're okay." I say softly. I glance over to their supplies. "Oh yikes." I mumble. 

"What?" Katniss asks. 

"Nothing they're just planning waxing you." I answer. "It'll hurt a lot for a few minutes and then you'll be fine." I say. 

"Cinna said to wax her." Octavia says. "Then she's got a dress fitting." 

I rub my forehead. "Okay. Just fix her eyebrows for now. I want to see his designs before you wax her whole body." 

"Thank you." Katniss says. I nod and leave to find Cinna. 

"Hey uncle Cinna! How much of Katniss needs to be waxed?" I ask.

"Only her face." Cinna answers. "Since it's winter I thought your bridesmaids could be dressing a Icy blue long sleeved dress." 

He pulls a cloth off a mannequin to reveal a long blue dress. It looks like shards of ice are swirling around it. 

"It's stunning." I whisper. "So do I get to see my dress?" I ask. 

"Indeed you do." Cinna pulls another cloth off a mannequin. It's stunning. Everything else in the room pales in comparison. It will hug the few curves I do while accentuating them. Instead of being a bright white it's a soft cream that will go with my skin better. After a few moments it fills me with dread; I'm getting married. I'm seventeen. It makes me want to run. Deep into the woods surrounding Twelve and to never come out. But I can't. I have to face this. 

"I'm seventeen." I whisper. Today is my birthday. I'm seventeen and I'm getting married. 

"Yeah." Cinna sighs. 

"I wish dad were still here." I sigh and rest my hands on my palm. Dad would've never let me get married. He wouldn't have even let me get engaged. If only I had someone to keep this from happening. 

"So do I." Cinna says. I glance at him. 

"Even if it's legal if we agree, we don't actually have to be married right?" I ask softly. 

"You definitely don't." Cinna says. "Date him for a little. Get to know each other." 

"Yeah." I smile wistfully. I wish I could live in a world where I could've openly dated Madge. 

"Tell you what, why don't I get you two set up on a date for tonight?" Cinna says. "I can take the others out for a nice dinner." 

"I think that would be nice." I answer. "I haven't ever gone on a date." 

"Really?" Cinna smiles. "Well this can be your first date." 

"Yeah, kind of strange that my first date is the week before my wedding." I smile. 

"Yeah that is strange." Cinna grins. "Let me get the rest of the family and you can try on your wedding dress." 

He leaves and I gently reach out to touch the dress. It's soft under my hands and it feels too nice to even touch. I step away because I want to preserve its beauty, as useless as that beauty is. 

"Come on! Everyone else gets to see it." I hear Cato complaining outside as everyone slides into the room. 

"Cinna is very talented." Katniss says inspecting the dresses. 

"Yeah, he is." I answer. I gently lead her to the blue dress. "And this is yours." 

"It's stunning." Katniss says in a hushed voice. It's like she too doesn't want to disrupt the beauty of it. 

"You two go get changed." Cinna says. He carefully gets Katniss's dress off of the dress form and leads her into the changing room. She comes out after a few minutes. The dress is stunning on her. Everyone gushes over it and Cinna quickly takes me into the fitting room. He helps me into the wedding gown and then leads me out to join Katniss. 

Everyone's jaws drop and Drift runs over to me. She stops right in front of me and gently touches the fabric. She looks up at Cinna with awe in her eyes. 

"It's so pretty Uncle Cinna." She says softly. He scoops her up. She warmed up to him very quickly. She had seen enough pictures of dad that she recognized him. When she first saw Cinna she had confused him for dad. 

"Ash you look amazing." Katniss says. "No wonder all the boys in Twelve wanted you before the Games." 

"They didn't." I shoot back. "Besides before the Games I could only see Madge and I was so focused on feeding Drift." 

"They did. You were just oblivious because you were staring at the merchant girls. Even Gale admitted at one point he thought about trying something." 

"Gale was hopelessly in love with you." I answer smiling. "Not like he was the only one." 

"Who are you even talking about?" Katniss says crossing her arms. 

"Peeta. The boy with the bread." I answer. To my surprise she blushed. "Oh my god! You're dating him!" 

"Okay yeah." Katniss wrinkles her nose. "He found me during the Games while you were passed out and he took care of me. I guess he was just there at the right time. He's really nice." 

"You should've told me." I protest. 

"I was going to but I didn't want to taint the woods and that was the only place you were happy and you. I just I never found the words." Katniss says. "He might be the one ya know." 

"Yeah. I know." I say softly. "I know." 

"Do you think Cato is the one?" Katniss asks. I guess since she's finally being taken care of, she's opened herself up to the idea. 

"I don't know." I answer honestly. "I mean for years my life had revolved around feeding my family and keeping us alive; I've finally got him back and I guess I'm just confused now." 

"Well, you should get to know him." Mrs Everdeen says. 

"Yeah. I finally can do that." I sigh. 

"Yeah. Now you should go find him." She says. I smile and nod. 

I get changed back out of my wedding dress and set off to find Cato. He's waiting for me by the doors. It's kind of nice. He is very attractive. 

"You know, they don't lock us in now." Cato says opening the door for me. 

"Well there's no fear of us leaving." I answer. He offers me his hand and I take it. "After all what are we running from?"

"I can think of something." He chuckles. "Okay so what's your favourite color?" 

"Green." I answer. "You?"

"Blue. Like the sky." Cato says. I smile and nod. 

"Okay." I take a deep breath. "Least favourite food?" 

"Tesserae." He says. "I didn't have to eat it much but sometimes it was all they had at school." 

"It's not bad if you cook it right." I answer. "I absolutely despise mushrooms." 

"Were they easy to avoid?" Cato asks. 

"Yeah I just don't harvest them." I say. "Or well didn't." 

"I see. Well now I know what not to cook you." He says. I smile and nod. 

"Indeed you do." I agree. 

"It's nice like this." He says. "Getting to know each other without fear of dying." 

"Yeah. It is." I agree smiling.


	8. Chapter 8

It's finally my wedding day. Despite the tradition in the Capitol that the bride and groom spend the night before apart, I wake in Catos arms like always. I carefully untangle myself from him and stand stretching. It's today. 

I sneak into my own room and carefully climb into my window. Katniss took over my room during our stay where Cato and I had taken over one of the mentors rooms. Prim was staying in Gales old room and Drift and Mrs Everdeen were in two more mentors rooms. Haymitch and Effie were of course in their own rooms. It's rather odd being back here without the threat of the Games looming over me. It's nice to have something happy to celebrate. Katniss stirs. She always wakes up early. It's pullover from our time hunting, we hunted before school and then again after. 

"Morning." She says. Her voice is scratchy. 

"Morning." I say softly. While I do sleep better with Cato, most of my nights still end with me waking up screaming for someone to run. 

"Sucks we aren't in twelve right now." Katniss yawns. "We could run. Hide in the Seam." 

"Yeah wouldn't that be nice." I agree. "We could run far away." 

"Ash!" My prep team bursts into the room and Katniss and I are surrounded. "We're just supposed to do your makeup and hair although it's too bad we aren't allowed to give you over to the surgeons. Next year they'll have to let us." 

"Why don't we just get ready?" I suggest. After next year I'm refusing to let them do anything to me. If they won't listen to me surely they'll listen to Cato. He's big and scary enough I bet they'll be scared into listening and if not maybe they have a rule about spouses needing to consent. 

The prep team chatters as they do our makeup and hair. They leave us in the hands of Cinna who adjusts our makeup and helps us into our dresses. He gently sets my veil on and properly decorates me with jewelry. He waits for Catos heavy footsteps to head down the hall and leads me out of the room. I'm taken to the elevator and we fly down. I'm getting married in President Snows garden. So we have to take a car down to his mansion. We're only dressed early for the sake of the Capitol citizens. My wedding is pretty soon after I get there which is nice because at least I don't have too much time to get nervous.

The music starts and Cinna gently takes my arm. He's the one escorting next down the aisle. It's good because Katniss would only help me run and Cinna will make sure I get down the aisle. Katniss leaves me and Cinna takes my arm. He carefully steers me down the aisle. I force myself to keep moving. It's rather like hunting in a way, but the closer I get the more I want to freeze like I just saw venomous snake. Too soon I'm join Cato and he's now holding my hands. At least I've been anchored down so I can't run. 

"It's not too late to run." Cato jokes in my ear. I suppress a smile. 

"Where would we go?" I whisper back. 

"12?" Cato suggests. I smile. 

"They'd find us." I answer. He opens his mouth but they interrupt us with the start of the wedding. 

The wedding was surprisingly nice. Afterwards was the feast that was supposed to be after the interview. I've been changed into a soft green dress. Cato slips his arm around my waist. We chat with the sponsors and eat until we're stuffed. 

Katniss pulls me into a dance. "You okay?" She asks softly. "I mean you just got married." 

"Yeah I'm okay." I answer nodding. "It's kind of nice. Takes the pressure off. I'm married, it's over. They can't take anything else from me." 

"Yeah." Katniss says. "Hey you'll be back to Twelve tomorrow." 

"Yeah we will be." I smile. "I can't wait to get home. It'll be nice." 

"Mind if I cut in?" Someone asks. Cato swoops in to take my place with Katniss and we start dancing. "You know I've been avoiding punch since we last met." 

"You fell in the punch." I grin. Despite my anger in the moment, him falling into the punch sometimes comes back to me in the dead of night. 

"Yeah it's been tainted ever since." He smiles. "Plutarch Heavensbee." 

"Nice to meet you." I say. 

"Im head gamemaker this year." He says casually. 

"Must not have had a lot of takers." I answer. 

"No I was the only one." He says. He carefully opens his watch and glances at it. Right as he opens it a mockingjay appears, except it's my pin. Suddenly I see it. It makes perfect sense. The mockingjay rising from the ashes of the Games. Maybe I am a mockingjay after all. "I must be going I've got a meeting." 

"It's rather late." I say. 

"It's starts at midnight." He smiles and steps away. As he leaves Effie appears with the rest of my party behind her. 

"It's time to go." Effie says. She herds us towards a few cars. 

"Shouldn't we thank the president?" Cato asks. 

"The proper gifts have been sent to him." Effie says. 

Soon enough we’re on the train heading back home. I can’t wait to get home. It’s safe there. Snow won’t bother with me there. I can’t wait until the festivities are done. Maybe Mrs Everdeen will take Drift and for a little I can run away to the little house by the lake. I like to think my family was connected to it. My dad showed the Everdeens years ago. Back when I wasn’t able to walk that far and on warm Sunday’s he would carry me up there and teach me to swim. He and Mr Everdeen always were hunting partners. Maybe someday I’ll take Drift with me. I can teach her to swim. She can finally have a chance if she ever enters the Games. Not that people wouldn’t target her immediately. They would. She’s related to a victor.


	9. Chapter 9

After making sure Mrs Everdeen will take care of Drift, I hurry up to my room and stuff clothes and soap into a bag. As a precaution I take a box of matches and run down to meet Katniss. I'm leaving the District for a few days. But Katniss and Cato are going to check in on me periodically. Katniss and I run down to the seam and I slide under the fence. We're bundled up against the cold and by the time we're halfway to the lake I'm sweating. 

We reach the house and I drop my bag on the floor. We have our bows and our hunting knives. I'm mostly feeding myself but I did bring some rice and beans. I kick my bag to the side and carefully build a fire. Katniss sits in front of the fire and smiles at me. 

"Maybe someday we can just settle down here and never come back." She says softly. 

"It's too close to the district." I answer. "They'd catch us. You could stay with me." I offer. 

"I need to bring Gales family game and I need to show Cato how to get into the woods." Katniss answers. The thought of someone other than Katniss, Gale and our fathers entering the woods brings me up short. For some reason the idea of Cato trespassing on my woods scares me. Maybe it's because it's the one place I still get to be me. It's the one place I ever got to mourn my parents. After all I had to be strong for Terra and Drift. Maybe that's why I volunteered for Katniss, I didn't have the fight for life like she did. The beauty had been gone for me. 

"Right." My voice sounds foreign. "Yeah he has to know how to get here." 

"What is it?" Katniss asks searching my face. 

"I don't know. I just don't want anyone knowing how to get into our woods." I say selfishly. 

"They are still our woods Phoenix." Katniss promises. "But you need to let him in. You can't shut everyone out." 

"I don't shut you out." I answer sullenly. 

"I don't count." Katniss shoots back. "When you started shutting people out, your walls grew around me." 

It's true. No matter what happened Katniss was always allowed in. She was my safe place. She was my person. I smile. A real smile. I save those for her. I mess with an arrow. 

"It would be nice to have a new hunting partner to drag the deer around." I answer. 

"It would." Katniss agrees. Katniss is only a tiny bit taller than me and we're both so slight that with Gale gone it takes both of us to get a deer to the butchers. "Mind if I ask you something?"

"Sure go ahead." I respond watching the lake. 

"Is it true? That killing someone is just like hunting?" Katniss asks. 

"In execution, yes. But afterwards it's completely different." I answer. "If you didn't know them, you wonder about their lives and you know someone is mourning them. If you did, all you know is that someone you cared for is gone and it's your fault." 

"Oh." Katniss crosses and hugs me tightly. In all of our years together it makes sense that we've memorized each other, the way we move, the way we think, the way we can just glance at each other and speak. Not even Gale could boast that much. When you've been inseparable since the cradle like we have, it makes sense that we don't have to talk to each other. 

"Make sure to take care of Drift." I say. 

"Ash, don't worry about Drift. It's been six years finally give yourself time to mourn the rest of your family." Katniss says. There was no hiding what this was about from her. When my parents died, I never let myself cry in front of my siblings which left very little time to cry. I was also the only one who could feed us which left little time for me to linger on their deaths. Then Terra got reaped and I had to be strong for Drift, Drift needed to be fed and taken care of. Katniss gives me one more hug and leaves me there. 

The next few days I spend alternating between crying and hunting. I try to keep myself in enough game that I won't go hungry. I missed hunting because I needed to feed myself. I'm in the woods not far from the lake when I hear a twig snap. The arrow is out of my quiver and pulled back before they have a chance to move again. I find myself looking into the seam grey eyes of Haymitch. Suddenly a rush of familiarity hits me. 

"You used to hunt with us." I say. He nods and I lower my bow. I slip my arrow back into my quiver and step towards him. "Come on." I say. 

"Where are we headed sweetheart?" He asks. 

"The little house." I answer. He follows me to it and we sit on the little step leading into the house while I strip the bird of its feathers. It's odd that it was even here but I'm grateful. 

"So how did you figure it out?" Haymitch asks. 

"Your eyes. They look like Mr Everdeens which is probably why I thought they were his but yours hold more pain." I answer. 

"Just like yours do." Haymitch says. I glance up at him. He also used to stop me on my way to the Hob and give me money to help with some of the other necessities. 

"Yeah." I say. "You were always taking care of us." 

"Yeah. I really tried with Terra and if I hadn't been such a drunkard I would've taken all three of you in." He says. 

"It's not your fault." I say. "You didn't want to face it. I don't blame you." 

"Yeah well." Haymitch sighs. "I wish I could've given you a better life." 

"You're the closest thing I have had to a father in years Haymitch. Even if you couldn't take us in, you took care of us." I say. I glance over at him and find tears streaming down his face. I hug him tightly and he hugs me back. 

"If you're the only person like a daughter to me I ever have, I got really lucky." Haymitch says. I smile softly. 

"You should stay for dinner." I say softly. He nods and I carefully start cooking. Haymitch sits on the ground and watches the fire. "You should hire a housekeeper." I say. 

"Yeah who do you think would be a good option?" Haymitch asks. 

"What about Hazel?" I suggest. "She needs money and you need a housekeeper." 

"That's actually a solid plan." Haymitch answers. "I'll ask her." 

"Thanks." I say softly. He slips his arm over my shoulder and pulls me close, the weight is familiar in a way I can't place for a moment. As I do I get rather choked up. It's in a fatherly way. The pieces fall into place and I smile softly. For the first time in a long time, my life is finally complete.


	10. Chapter 10

I stretch and start my hike back down to the District. I'm going to drop my bag off at my old house for the sake of the peacekeepers. I slide under the fence after hiding my bow in the woods. I leave my bag on my old bed and pause for moment. I wish dad was still here. He would've lifted the burden of feeding a family off of me and I could've had someone to rely on. 

My mind is so occupied while I'm walking through town I almost miss the odd whistling that sounds through the air. I push through the crowd and soon reach the front. The crowd had been pushing me back trying to keep me away from what's happening. Katniss. I finally break free and find Katniss strung up on a post passed out. Her back is full of bloody wounds and the man raises the whip again. I react instinctively and throw myself in front of the whip throwing my arms up to block the lash. It slices across my face and I gasp in pain. I stumble down and he starts to whip me instead. I'm glad, Katniss is finally getting a break. 

"Hey!" Haymitch stops him and helps me up. "President Snow isn't going to be very happy that you're scarring up his granddaughter." 

"She interrupted the punishment of a confessed criminal." The man growls. 

"I don't care if she blew up the Justice Building! President Snow gave me strict instructions!" Haymitch says. 

"That's not my problem." The man says, his voice has a slight bit of doubt creeping in and I finally get a good look. The short hair and cold black eyes. I can feel the blood dripping down my body and my knees start to buckle again. He must have got in quite a few before Haymitch came along. 

"No? Well it's about to be! First call I make when I get home is directly to President Snow!" Haymitch snaps. "Find our who authorized you to mess up my victor's pretty little face!" 

"She was poaching. What businesses is it of hers, anyway?" The man asks. 

"That's her sister." Cato helps me up. "And my wife. So if you want to get to her, expect to go through both of us." 

Maybe we're the only ones who can stand up like this, although in my case I'm barely standing. The cold is biting into my back and I can tell the whip ripped apart my coat. My eyes find a lump on the ground and I press my hand against my mouth. Darius, one of the nice peacekeepers. If it hadn't been for the Games I could've seen myself with him. He was always teasing me and Katniss about kissing him. 

The new Head Peacekeeper glances back at his backup squad, which is still our friends from the Hob. A woman named Purnia who eats at Greasy Saes regularly, steps forward stiffly. "I believe, for a first time offense the required number of lashes has been dispensed sir. Unless your sentence is death, which we would carry out by firing squad." 

"Is that standard procedure here?" Asks the Head Peacekeeper.

"Yes sir." Purina says, several other nod in agreement. I'm sure none of them know the standard procedure because for us the standard procedure for fresh game is to bid on the best bits. 

"Very well. Get your sister out of here girl." He practically spits the word girl at me. "When she wakes up, remind her that poaching off the capitols land, I'll assemble that firing squad myself." 

He wiped his hand along the length of the whip splattering us with blood. He coils the whip into quick neat loops and leaves us. The others fall in an awkward line behind him with a few stopping to pick up Darius. I catch Purnias eye and mouth a thanks. She doesn't respond but I know she got the message. 

"Katniss." I say faintly as I struggle my way out of Catos arms but I can only manage a step before I collapse. For a moment I'm taken back to the cave before the world curves around me and grows dark. 

I wake laying face down on our couch in my home. I struggle to push myself off the couch and Prim hurries over. She gently keeps me down and brushes a curl off my cheek. 

"Katniss." I gasp out. "I need to get to Katniss." 

"Katniss is being taken care of." Prim says. "Moms taking good care of her. You were hit pretty badly too." 

"How many lashes did he get in?" I ask. 

"Around twelve. But he hit harder than he did to Katniss." Prim says. 

"He recognized me." I say. "Snow must've told him about me, he must've figured out my hunting." 

"Either way, you need to rest." Prim says. "You're cut up pretty badly." 

"I survived the Games, I can handle this." I say stubbornly. Prim shakes her head. 

"You need to rest." She says. She leaves and I start to get up again when Haymitch takes her spot. 

"Hey kid." He says brushing his hair out of my eyes. 

"Hey Haymitch." I mumble. "Thank you." 

"Hey I'm always here." He promises. I smile softly at him. 

"Could you do me two more favours?" I ask softly. 

"Anything." Haymitch says. 

"Check in Katniss and get Drift to bed." I say softly. "She doesn't like to sleep without someone she trusts there." 

"I will take good care of them." Haymitch says. He leans down and kisses my forehead. "Just settle down and get some sleep." 

"Okay dad." I tease. He chuckles and leaves me. I let myself drift off to sleep. 

I wake to a loud knock. I carefully push myself up and walk to the door. I find Madge and she pushes her way into the house. 

"You need to lay down." She says. She leads me back to the couch and helps me lay down. She carefully takes a seat on the floor and gently runs her fingers across my cheekbone. "Listen, I know what you and I have isn't what you need right now." 

"Madge." I start. She gently shushes me. 

"I finally realized when I saw how Haymitch reacted to you fainting. He caught you before you could hit the ground. You don't need me or Cato to survive, you need a family. You finally have a family." She says. 

"No Madge. I do need you. You're also my family." I say. "You always have been." 

"I'm still not letting you chose." Madge says. 

"Just stay for a little." I say softly. 

"I'll stay until you're awake." Madge promises. I smile and close my eyes falling asleep.


	11. Chapter 11

It's been a few weeks since the whipping and no one has even tried to get into the woods. The town has changed and I'm struggling to find the part of it that always reminded me of home. Of course that bit was always somewhere deep in the woods. Where I could almost see my dad standing near me and carefully helping me aim. Haymitch has been a saint in all of this. 

"There's a mandatory viewing tonight." Prim says. She's just come home from school with Drift. "I think they're finally going to air your wedding." 

"It's been so long I doubt they're going to air it at all." I answer as I carefully get out the plates to set the table. "What time is the showing?" 

"Eight." Drift answers. 

"It's probably the announcement about the quarter quell." Mrs Everdeen says. My mind flashes to Haymitch. 

"We should make sure he isn't alone." I say softly. "Invite him and Cato over to watch it." 

"Yeah that's a good idea." Mrs Everdeen agrees. 

"Maybe we could also finally give him a year off from mentoring." I say softly. "He's been through enough." 

"He has." Katniss agrees. "You should go ask him." 

"I will." I answer. "I'll also see if he wants to join us for dinner." 

"Okay good." Katniss says. I leave the house and start across the street to Haymitch's house. 

"Haymitch." I call as I step into the house. 

"In here sweetheart." Haymitch calls. 

"You're coming over for dinner and then there's a mandatory viewing." I say. 

"Ahh the great revealing of the quarter quell twist." Haymitch says. 

"Yeah I wonder how they'll punish me." I say. My mind flashes to Katniss and Prim. Maybe they'll target Drift. I glance at Haymitch and for a second I wonder if they could find a way to target him, of course they'd have to target me too. 

"No clue sweetheart." Haymitch says. My mind drifts to the barely contained rage in most of the districts. I look at Haymitch. I started something. Whether it was with the rose, with Rue, or with my arrow. I can't contain anything. Nothing I could do to stop that. I never could have tamped anything down. That was why Snow did all the things he did. 

"Come on. Let's get going." I say. Haymitch stands and offers me his arm. He's been sober for a few days. He's really trying to better himself for me and Drift. I take his arm and we cross over to my house. There's a car in front of Catos house and I glance at it curiously. I dismiss it as we enter the house and we're swept into our normal dinner routine. 

By eight we're huddled in front of the tv with Cato sitting next to me. He hasn't brought up the visitor but the car left during dinner. The show starts with a showing of our wedding. It replays all of our happiness and it has several shots of me and Katniss. We're happy, laughing. The show ends with another shot of Katniss and I. Snow appears on the screen and I recoil physically. A little girl beside him holds a box which he opens and selects a yellowed envelope from within. He gives a small speech about the quarter quell and explains the last two before opening the envelope and clearing his throat. 

"As a reminder that even the strongest among them can not over come the power of the Capitol, the tributes will be reaped from the existing pool of victors." Snow read. 

My mind is blank for a moment and then it floods in. I'm the only female victor for District Twelve. Haymitch, Haymitch is the only male victor that originates from Twelve. It's either him or Cato and I can't kill either of them. I don't think they could kill me either. 

"Snow came by. He told me that I still count as District Two." Cato says. Which leaves Haymitch. Or them both. He'll have to go to two and he may be sent back into the Games. But either way I'll have to die. 

Our group is silent trying to process the events of tonight until Cato leaves. As soon as he's gone I turn to Haymitch. "We aren't getting out of these Games are we?" 

"It doesn't look like it sweetheart." Haymitch answered. 

"I'm sorry." I say softly. He hugs me tightly and for a moment I wish I could stay there. I wish I could just go numb and wait here to die but I can't. I have to get to a point where I can save Haymitch. He'll take care of Katniss and the rest of my family. I pull away and force myself to put on a brave face. "Can't let Snow are that he got to me." 

"Of course not. And he didn't get to you." Haymitch says. "You and I will give him a giant middle finger somehow." 

I nod and he leaves. Without thinking once he's gone I run. Katniss follows me and I know exactly where I'm going. I slide under the fence and hurry to my weapons. The sooner they're in my hands the sooner I'm safe. Katniss grabs her own bow and we press deeper into the woods. I'm trying to hide in the safety of my woods but suddenly everything is the arena. My breath shakes and I stumble into a tree. My vision blues as I gasp for breath. On the ground is Rue. Rues dead. Suddenly I'm screaming and backing away but now there's Gale and Clove. Catos dead body is next to Cloves and I drop my bow my hands shaking. 

"Ash." Katniss gently takes my arm and picks up my bow. "Hey it's okay I'm here." 

"You're here." I mumble. If she's here it's not real. I bury my face into my hands. "I can't do it again." I mumble. 

"I know." Katniss rubs my arm. "Come on, let's get home." 

"Yeah let's get home." I agree. We carefully start back for the fence and drop off our bows. I'm about to slide under the fence when I hear the buzzing. "The fence is live." 

"Alright do we wait?" Katniss asks. I pause and shake my head. 

"It's common knowledge that we hunt. They must've trapped us. We need to get over the fence and home so they can't use this against us." I say. I guess to win you have to think like your enemy. Or maybe I'm just not decent anymore. 

"Alright let's get over the fence." Katniss agreed.

I follow the fence and find a tall tree. Katniss joins me and we carefully climb it's neighboring tree. Our tree is too slick with ice. I carefully cross into our tree and move across its branch. I hang down and let myself drop. While the snow cushions me, the ground still greets me harder than comfortable. I carefully push myself to my feet and move out of the way so Katniss can follow suit. I can tell that my heel is hurt and my back feels broken. Katniss drops and I help her up. She groans and we carefully limp home.


End file.
